It was such an honor yesterday to be featured over on The Unfit Christian for a live Facebook chat on Making Pleasure A Priority. The conversation was so fluid and fun. I truly enjoyed myself. Thank you to everyone who joined me for the experience. I'm so excited to connect with you here. If you missed the interview you want to be sure to check it out. The video for some reason wasn't working very well but you can hear us very clearly. So when you have a few down moments check it out.
I wrote this prepping for my conversation tonight with The Unfit Christian. We touched on it briefly in the live chat but I had to go back and share here.
It is an act of violence for a person or institution to attempt to disconnect a person from their body, sexual expression or agency. As a former praise dance choreographer I have seen this happen in the church so many times. It has become a norm for many churches to demand that the participants,who are mostly (99% of the time) young girls and older women, to cover themselves to the extremes of requiring gloves or shoes in order to minister and not tempt congregation members into lustful thinking or acts.
This is ludicrous. It's not that this is a rule held across the board, that regardless of your gender, we cover all parts of the body in order to be in a state of reverance. Women/girls are held to a higher standard to control someone else's lust. I don't care how many ways you twist this around this is the re-enforcement of rules rooted in rape culture and victim blaming. What's especially disheartening is that this is happening in spaces where we are expected to lay ourselves naked & vulnerable emotionally before God.
My question is how do you even expect people, women specifically, to develop a dynamic relationship with God if you expect us to also demonize and disconnect from the body or own temples?
This demand discounts of our experiences of personal and systemic trauma that many people desperately seek answers to resolve within the safe space of our sanctuaries. These traumas literally live and linger in the muscle memory of our bodies. But we are being fed to stay disconnected in order to stay reverent in our worship so there's no way that we can even BEGIN to walk the healing process that's necessary to address body-trauma. So we can be restored and healed as long as we don't have to deal with her abuse, her rape, her abortion, her self-mutilation, her dysmophia, her rage etc all things that require we take an honest look at the body in order to heal.
In many ways women are forced to play church from the neck up vs. having a visceral full body connection to God. I'm not surprised that these issues flood into every other area of our lives from health challenges to non-existent sex drives. Our bodies are craving to just move and dance in uninhibited ways so we can fully reconnect back to that power source that is within us. Intuitively we know that our bodies have to be included in our healing process.
That's where the Reclaiming Your Sexy Intensives pick up the ball. The intensive creates a safe space and sanctuary where women and femme identified souls can *actually* get naked emotionally, spiritually and physically so we can do the deep healing work in order to transform our lives beyond cute colloquial terms and scriptures.
Films referenced in yesterday's interview!
Articles & Resources On Making Pleasure A Priority
Making Yourself a Priority Before It Becomes an Emergency
Why do I teach erotic dance? And why this isn't your average fitness class
A glimpse inside The Reclaiming Your Sexy Experience
I would love to have you join us for The Reclaiming Your Sexy Tour Experience
You can use the code : theunfitchristian for the next 6/15 8pm CST to get $50 off your ticket to any of the Reclaiming Your Sexy one day intensives. Click the arrow on the widget below to see the upcoming dates/cities and to purchase your tickets.